Wednesday April 4th
" All I think about is having you inside me, carbs."
Thursday April 5th
" If you want to be rich so badly, maybe you should start looking for a job."
I Applied for The Papacy, They said i was too young.
Friday April 6th
" TGIF because....................................................."
Sat/Sun April 7/8
" Here's to getting all my grocery shopping done for the week on Sunday and eating half of it by Monday."
Monday April 9th
" Thanks to Congress for teaching us that you don't have to work hard to play hard."
Tuesday April 10th
" Meditating is the practice of doing nothing and then bragging about it."
Wednesday April 11th
" My office crush is the vending machine."
Thursday April 12th
" Really great meeting you but I'm currently not in the market for new friends."

Speaking of friends,,,,I hope Scrummy and Weirdone are OK. Who knows,,,maybe Scrummy WAS accepted by the Papacy and started his new gig? And maybe Weirdone is his secretary?
Friday April 13th
" This Friday I'm going to..........................................."
sleep
Sat/Sun April 14/15
" I'm brave in that I'll drink outdoors during a high pollen count."
Monday April 16th
" I wish I had stolen a better umbrella from a co-worker today."
Tuesday April 17th
" I want to have a baby just so I can still hang out with my friends who have babies."
Wednesday April 18th
" Every day is Hump Day when I'm with you."