I Misunderstood 50Plus - Until Now

I stumbled across 50Plus at the end of May,2020. At that time, I was just signing up for all dating sites looking for I don't know what - well, let's be honest, I was looking for a relationship even though I stated "Friendship."
So I went through the first 6 months thinking and focusing on trying to find a woman who I could get a relationship with, even though I said, "Friendship." In the first 5-1/2 months, I encountered scammers upon scammers. It became a challenge for me to spot and report them.

(By the way, every Dating Site has them, so you'll encounter them where ever you go. And, I've had the pleasure of reporting a "variation of the same theme," as I was able to recognize the same scammer 3 times under different aliases.")

Along the way, I also met some nice people. Some have stayed, some have left. Though I don't maintain contact with them, I still think fondly of them wondering, "What if our differences of opinions hadn't been so far apart?"
But, as others dropped off, new one's took their places and BY ACCIDENT, I inadvertently renewed my 50Plus Premium Membership! Honest, folks, I hit the wrong button. I decided it was "destiny," or is it really, "fate," that made me do that?
In any event, just before accidentally renewing my membership, I connected with two beautiful women as "Friends." After the accident, I decided it was "Fate" that made me hit the wrong button and decided I'd just as well stay on as a Premium Member.
Since then, I've come to realize that 50Plus is more than just a "Dating Site."
Looking at all the categories of subjects that a person can get involved with made me see that I can, and hopefully will, make my thoughts known, make friends, and just have fun in 50Plus.
I now know that 50Plus is not just about "hooking up," 50 Plus is about a community of people who can share their thoughts and establish long lasting relationships based on friendship.
ClydeKen

Thank you for expressing what a lot of us think about this site but never put into words. I’m glad you accidentally hit the renewal button by mistake. Knowing that you will still here and continue to share your stories and poems makes my heart happy.
celeste

Yes, a lot of us think that way and just the part of making new friends is so nice.
Most of us are alone, went through whatever relationships or bad times and can use some good friends and some fun chats. I for one , am not a bar /club going person anymore, been there, done that and still have a few T Shirts.
And some of us have met their match and are very happy. I really like this site , it brought me good friends and a very special man.
Dutchy

Klyde, your words hit differently on my soul.
I have not accidently renewed my membership but otherwise our experience is similar.
I joined in April hoping to find friends because the lockdown had us all so isolated I was lonely and missing the outside world of friends, family and work.
On 50plus I've made some good friends that I believe we will be friends for life. When in chat we try to forget the everyday struggles loneliness and bumps on the road. We laugh, joke, share experiences and have fun. Most people that are there will join in for the distraction and laughs.

Mostly 50plus is a community who supports each other, I'm so grateful that I stumbled across this site.
Yes, we have scammers and that takes away from the positive experience of this site.
We also have some people who are not always collaborative but we shouldn't judge because we are all going through stuff in life and we don't know what each person is struggling with.
Thank you Klyde for your words of wisdom.

DutchyL and sunnyday_101:
Thank you for your kind words.

Will you accept a Friend request from me? If so, send me the Friend request and I'll acknowledge it.

ClydeKen

Sir CK,

Wow, your experience on dating sites matched mine in terms of running across scammers. In my case, it was often African guys pretending to be women. I reported them to the web admins and had their accounts deleted, but they would just steal more pics online and register under a different name. Pretty sure the site allowed it so that they could use the artificially boosted memberships as a selling point to lure in people.

Where our experiences differ is in the real members we met. When I suggested to women I met on the site that we be friends, too often I got the same reply: "I have enough friends". And that's not even counting the ones with unresolved emotional baggage. I learned the hard way that sometimes there are very good reasons why some people are alone. Lol

Then there were the foreign women who contacted me, but expected me to visit them, despite the fact that they contacted me! I was even contacted by a woman who claimed to be divorced, but who I found out was married and living with her husband! I guess cheaters are equal-opportunity offenders.

As you can imagine, I was highly skeptical and reluctant to try yet another site. But so far, this one is different and pretty nice. It's cool to be able to meet sincere people, and be able to communicate with them and share knowledge, ideas, experiences and interests. As a newbie, I'm still working on learning how to navigate the site. But it's definitely been an interesting experience.

Hi ClydeKen,

Seems like quite a few people resonated with your sentiments, AND are glad you've stayed.

It's good to know the positive experiences have outweighed the negative - hopefully I shall find that too. I'm not looking for romance, so I shall be interested to see if that keeps the scammers away.

I look forward to chatting sometime.

Agreed, Clyde, and thanks for posting.

I've been using a number of sites and have made it a bit of an indoor sport to spot the scammers. They are plentiful! Hadn't heard about African dudes posing as women, though. Egad!

One of the dead giveaways is the appealing profile written in standard English leading to correspondence with someone who couldn't use the correct tense or agree verb to subject if their life depended on it! By their diction shall ye know them! That, and requests for money -- though I haven't yet sashayed that far down the primrose path myself...

A lot of people are hooked by these folks, and agreed 100% that no site is immune. I read stories from time to time about broken hearts and emptied bank accounts, which make me feel rather battle-hardened!

I jumped at this site because of the chat & forum opportunities. What a welcome change from swiping left or right!

I'm really looking forward to getting to know a few folks and making some friends online, and perhaps even IRL, assuming the vaccines eventually drive away the COVID.

I hope 2021 brings good things to all of us!

Mealla

ClydeKen,

Thank you for eloquently conveying the thoughts that I, myself, had struggled to put into words.

I have tried the popular dating sites like eHarmony and Match only to find scammers and one-night stands.

I, for one, am grateful that I stumbled upon 50plus when I signed up in late October 2020. Though I was on hiatus due to demands from my job, I returned and have visited the site daily. I have since acquired a small list of friends and still working to add more.

Kat

Recently became a widow and reading the comments, I have a lot to learn. Like many have said you don't know who to trust. I had a spam on Facebook. Sure told some good lies and almost had be hooked. He might have been a Russian

Wow, I like reading all this. I stumbled upon 50 plus online while trying to decide what site to try. I am still debating the dating thing but it is nice to see that there are people that are wanting to just be friendly. I may have to stick around a bit.

I am new to the site, and really looking for genuine long lasting friendships, which are so hard to find.

Lisa

I have found a lot of wolves in sheep's clothing, both male and female here. That seems to be the nature of these people, looking for vulnerable people to prey on or even just to feel superior. I know Graham tells everyone to beware and keep personal contact info to themselves. Graham is quite good at protecting the club members from predators when he is contacted with abuses and is sometimes just around the corner ready to pounce
I have been in the midst of lengthy silliness that made all our hearts smile. I have found some witty, decent, caring people who like to share the simple joys in life as well. This is also the nature of this site, people who are not afraid to reach out and really care. One member I know came in asking questions and was given very sound advice that saved his life. I have heard people that just needed a friend to help them hold on for one more day come back with gratitude and appreciation.
I hope the scammers don't scare any of you off. Just get as much info as you can and report it and look for the decent ones who will lift your hearts and spirits. It is worth it.

Hey DS, good to see you, and great advice. Sometimes you just have to put some people on 'ignore' and carry on. There have always been some great people on here, and of course those who just want to cause havoc. The good thing is you don't have to pay attention to them.

Thanks Applemac, nice to see you too, and yes the ignore button is there for just such havoc causing people. Don't feed those wolves and give yourself the chance to meet some truly wonderful people. <3