Do you want people to accept you as you are? ........ or do you want them to like you?

I'll never forget the first time we met ............... although I'll keep trying.

Why don't you slip into something more comfortable ..... like a coma.

Any similarity between you and a human ..... is purely coincidental!

I hear you were born on April 2 ..... that was a day too late!

You have a lot of well-wishers ..... They would all like to throw you down one.

I bet your brain feels as good as new ..... seeing that you've never used it.

If you were twice as smart ..... you'd still be stupid.

You're not yourself today ..... I noticed the improvement immediately.

Some people are has-beens ..... You are a never-was.

We hear you are a lady killer ..... They take one look at you and die of fright!!

I hear the only place you're ever invited ..... is outside.

What's on your mind? ..... If you'll forgive the overstatement.

If ignorance is bliss ..... you must be the happiest person alive.

As an outsider ..... what do you think of the human race?

Your ridiculous little opinion ..... has been noted.

I heard that you changed your mind ..... So, what did you do with the nappy/diaper?

You started at the bottom ..... and it's been downhill ever since!

"Brains aren't everything ..... In fact in your case they're nothing"

"You don't know the meaning of the word 'fear' ..... but then again you don't know the meaning of most words"

"I don't want you to turn the other cheek ..... it's just as ugly."

"I was asked what it would take to make you look good ..... I said "About a mile"

"You have discovered the secret of ..... perpetual middle age."

I'd like to leave you with one thought ..... but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it!

Keep talking ..... someday you'll say something intelligent.

You are as useless as ..... a rubber beak on a woodpecker

You come from a long line of estate agents ..... they're a vacant lot.

You are so old that your blood type ..... was discontinued.

Are you just visiting ..... this planet

I like your approach ..... now let's see your departure.

I would have liked to insult you ..... but with your intelligence you wouldn't get offended.

I'd like to give you a going-away present ..... but you have to do your part.

If I said anything to you that I should be sorry for ..... I'm glad.

:lol: :lol:

:lol: :lol: thanks for the laugh Dave, you seem to have a great sense of humor
single55 wrote: :lol: :lol: thanks for the laugh Dave, you seem to have a great sense of humor

Thanks I try, they say laughter is the best medicine.

Once your sense of humour goes, it's downhill from there.