Hi
I know Chat 50+ is a dating site.
As someone that met his late wife through a chat room, I thought I would relate some of my past experiences, I know things have changed since 1999 which is when I met my wife, and we should all be wary of scammers.

Chat rooms are or have been on the decline, in our day there were two popular chatrooms which both myself and my wife frequented (I will not name them). With the advent of Covid 19, chat rooms have made some small revival with people being isolated and working from home or bereaved looking for company and someone to talk to. If you are in these categories you might be vulnerable to a clever scammer out of a need to communicate. You need to be vigilant, tell tail signs are often there even if we do not want to believe them. (see later)

When I met my wife we were in the chatroom with other people, not one to one or face to face. You get to know people in a chatroom and you strike up VIRTUAL relationships with them and hopefully have fun. If you meet someone in a chatroom you like, take it slowly, get to know them. Do not expect a “smile” to reveal the love of your dreams, it will not.

I can sit here and tell you I look like Dwayne Johnson in physique or height or any other characteristic, when I am the same weight, and about 2 feet smaller in height and wider in girth. I could be smoking 60 a day for all you know…. I can tell you anything that makes you want to like me and trust me.

For some reason people seem to shun the chatroom on 50+, maybe because its not so well populated, people come in and go out, there seems to be a magic “hour” around 9.30 to 11.00pm UK time when people are there and chat.

My wife and I chatted for about a year before we met, we learned a lot about each other in that time, she always said that chatting in the room was much quicker in learning about someone than real life… We chatted one to one after a while.

During that year of chat you pick up on things that are not right, inconsistent, plus being in a chatroom others might also pick up on things you did not, even if you do not want to believe them. Being in the chatroom with others helps to keep you safe.

There were couples that did meet, and unwanted pregnancies resulted with no continued relationships, ok in chat 50+ that might be classed as a miracle!

Eventually we did call on the telephone, I remember the costs of the telephone bills! We also used emails to communicate, but even that has come on technology wise since my day.

She was a Canuck, from Ontario, I live in the UK. I went to visit her in summer 1999, travelling 3500 miles to god knows what, it was a wonderful experience. However, I could have been buried under a Wheatfield never to be seen again! I took a chance, 20 years ago the internet was much more innocent. Life is about chances, but hopefully we can mitigate these risks. It did occur to me what if we do not get on, or like each other face to face? Lots of what ifs.

She came here for the Christmas and new year 2000. We married on August 18th 2000 and had 20 good years together.

Do not listen to sob stories and do not send money, or bank details to anyone, whatever the circumstances… May seem harsh, but it may cost you more in the end!

Be honest. For example, I have a “Drop foot” due to a motor cycle accident many years ago, resulting in a limp, and it impairs how far I can walk.

One last thing I had never considered, if you meet someone from a different country, have you considered whether you or they want to move and relocate to that country? That is a big question to be answered.

Conclusions – This is not a definitive list and you may think of other things to add to it.

1. DO NOT GIVE BANK DETAILS TO ANYONE!
2. Take things slow, do not rush.
3. Chat lots especially in the chatroom with others around.
4. Chat even more one to one if you reach that stage, the more you know about each other the better.
5. Be honest!
6. Video calls are ok, since you will see each other, but manage them the way you want them to go, and if you are uncomfortable stop.
7. Email is good for photos etc. You might want to set up a separate email for this??? Or maybe not, I never did, but times were more innocent.
8. Do not be in a rush to meet, be sure you want to meet.
9. The first meet should be in a populated area.
10. When you do meet make sure it is on your own terms and someone knows where your going and when you will be back, and stay in touch with friends and family (I did not, but I survived, I was lucky).
11. If it does not work out, try and part on good terms and RESPECT either way.
12. Do you want to live in another country?

I recently met someone from chat 50+, and I guess we broke some of this advice, it has to feel right is all I can say. Every situation is different.

IF IT DOES NOT FEEL RIGHT STAY HOME.

Love and Peace.
Mick1957 wrote: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-57935467


That is just the saddest thing.